Jan 31, 2007

POLICE FORCE STING TO DROP LUTE; REUNION WILL RAKE IN LOOT

You might have heard that the other two members of The Police are holding an intervention at the Grammy Awards on 2/11/07, making Sting drop the lute and forcing him to play good music. I almost thought about tuning in this year because of this to wonder how they'll sound. I bet they're going to play "Be My Girl - Sally". Or maybe a medley featuring "Synchronicty II", "Man in a Suitcase" and "Don't Stand So Close To Me '07 (featuring Xhibit and Fergie)".

Everyone is assuming a World Tour is to follow, or at the very least a few festival dates. For all of this to happen I think Stewart Copeland must have compromising photos of Sting that he's using to blackmail him. Whatever the case may be, here are some things you probably didn't know about The Police:

• Sting was born Gorbley Fantastico McSwiggan, which was changed to Gordon Sumner III before he finally switched to his nickname.

• Guitarist Andy Summers is deaf. (I mean, have you heard the guitar solo during "Driven To Tears"? Yikes.)

• Because of religious reasons, Stewart Copeland refuses to play the drums before dusk.

• Sting stole his nickname from the famous WCW wrestler Steve Borden.

• During their 1982 Synchronicity Tour, the band had a "rider" that demanded that they be provided with freshly caught haddock, 12 cans of spotted dick, lawn darts, a frisbee, and an accordion tuner at every show.

• Stewart Copeland once ordered a ham sandwich in Texas, and returned it because it had mustard on it instead of the mayonnaise that he clearly ordered. The sandwich was given to him at no charge.

• The song "Man In A Suitcase" was written about a man who was found dead in a suitcase attempting to sneak on board their tour plane.

• Andy Summers' favorite season is spring.

• Stewart Copeland's drumsticks are whittled from the bones of African cheetahs.

• "Tea In The Sahara" is based on a children's book by W. Somerset Maugham entitled "Everybody Poops".

• Sting practices "tantric sex", which allows him to watch pornography for up to 8 hours at a time without sleeping or ordering pizza.

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