GREG PATILLO "MARIO FLUTE"

I guess this qualifies as music: a beatboxing flute player. Yeah, I never thought I'd type that phrase either. Here's Greg Patillo playing "Mario Flute", his rendition of the various music from the classic NES Super Mario Bros. video game. Excellent!



He also does "Inspector Gadget" and "Sesame Street". Pretty amazing.

"WEIRD" AL YANKOVIC - BOB

This is nothing short of brilliant. The lyrics of this 'Weird' Al song are made up entirely of palindromes, and the video is a parody of Bob Dylan's classic "Subterranean Homesick Blues" (from D.A. Pennebaker's Don't Look Back). Hilarious.

A FISTFUL OF FESTIVALS

Here's the real 2007 Bonnaroo artist lineup (partial):

The Police • Tool • Widespread Panic • The White Stripes • Ben Harper & the Innocent Criminals • Wilco • The Flaming Lips • MANU CHAO Radio Bemba Sound System • The String Cheese Incident • Franz Ferdinand • Bob Weir & Ratdog • Damien Rice • Ween • Gov't Mule • Ziggy Marley • The Decemberists • Kings of Leon • Michael Franti and Spearhead • Wolfmother • Regina Spektor • The Black Keys • Galactic • DJ Shadow • Gillian Welch • Spoon • Keller Williams (WMD'S) • Sasha & John Digweed • STS9 • Old Crow Medicine Show • The Hold Steady • Lily Allen • North Mississippi Allstars • Fountains Of Wayne • Hot Tuna • Feist • Hot Chip • The Richard Thompson Band • Cold War Kids • Girl Talk • Rodrigo y Gabriela • Annuals • The National • The Little Ones • Black Angels • Lewis Black & Friends • Dave Attell • David Cross

Alas, no Tom Waits and no Dylan--I knew the "rumored" list was bullshit. The only ones they got right were The Police, Lily Allen, Fountains of Wayne, Girl Talk, Annuals, Cold War Kids, The Decemberists, and a couple of minor bands. But they added Wilco, Flaming Lips, Tool, White Stripes, Spoon, The Black Keys, Manu Chao, Damien Rice, and Richard Thompson (not to mention the comedy of David Cross, Lewis Black and Dave Attell). So it's pretty damn interesting as it is. Wait a sec--HOT TUNA? Aren't they 500 years old?

Sasquatch Music Festival is way the fuck up in the Northwest, and features Björk, Beastie Boys, Interpol, Arcade Fire, Spoon, among others. It's 2718 miles from my apartment, in George, Washington. Get it? George Washington? Crafty, those Washingtonians.

In support of their 6th album Zeitgeist(to be released 07.07.07, a neat number and also my mom's birthday) Smashing Pumpkins will also be doing the festival thing, though only in Europe so far. And no, it's not a reunion. People are even nitpicking and saying "it's not really SP without D'Arcy and Iha", but I liken it to The Cure, who can be Robert Smith and anyone and still be The Cure.

Definitely not a reunion: The Jam will be touring . . . without Paul Weller. Huh? Okay, that would be like seeing The Cure without Robert Smith.

As always, these festivals never happen in the Northeast. Grrr.

F***! THE POLICE ON THE GRAMMYS

"Hello, we're the Police and we're back!" And so began the Grammy Awards last night, as the reformed trio sang "Roxanne" (which was a good bet). While it was a competent rendition, it wasn't really that exciting, though it was thankfully 100% lute free. Some people commented that he can't hit the high notes in the chorus, but he didn't attempt those in 1979 either--I think he only did that the one time in the studio, actually. I was actually focusing on how the 3 of them looked (in HD), and despite Stewart Copeland's old man glasses they looked pretty much intact. But as soon as Jamie Foxx came on after the song ended, I quickly switched to "The Simpsons", and I was done watching (8:00 - 8:05). So it's official: I can no longer say I saw their last public performance in person. Oh well.

Only two other notes I have about the Grammy winners:

1) St. Elsewhere by Gnarls Barkley won Best Alternative Album. Alternative to what? How is something alternative when it's on every radio station? They were quite possibly the biggest crossover band of the year, so they were as non-alternative as you could get. I would have given it to the Arctic Monkeys.

2) Two words: "My Humps". Yes, that shitty song by Black Eyed Peas won an award, beating Death Cab for Cutie, The Fray, and Keane for Best Song by Duo or Group. Given the choices, I would have even allowed Pussycat Dolls to win that. Are you fucking kidding me?

And with that, the Grammys can go screw themselves. I was quite happy in a world that loathed the Dixie Chicks. What a nightmare the recording industry has become.